Family
by TrainxEve-Fan12
Summary: "I'm telling mom!" Coco had exclaimed teasingly.  Then, in a smaller voice, a sad afterthought, she had added, "Who is she, anyway?"  And suddenly, Crash understood.


**A/N: 'ELLO DARLINS.**

**Okay. I was playing Crash: Mind Over Mutant, which I happen to love. And when you hit Crunch he spouts hilarious lines that make no sense. Many of Coco's lines are similarly random, but one consists of "I'm telling mom!" and then more quietly, like an afterthought, "Who is she, anyway?" And while it seems offhand and unimportant, the more I thought about it the sadder it made me.**

**And thus, it inspired this fic. For those who know that I happen to ship CrashxCoco, don't worry, this isn't a pairing fic. It's just some brotherly and sisterly love between the two, nothing romantic. I love the sibling dynamic these two have. 3**

**As for placement, this takes place shortly after Mind Over Mutant. I also used Crash's apparent ability to speak, but only at the end…and I like to think it's pretty touching.**

"Coooocoooo!" Crunch called, robotic hand and normal one cupped around his mouth to make the yell carry. "C'mon, where're ya hiding?" he called loudly across the island, and then let out a groan. He looked at Crash, who was on top of his house, getting a bird's eye view of the island. "Findin' anything, Crash?"

Crash gave a signature squeak and shook his head. He jumped down from the building, walking next to his brother and shrugging apologetically.

"I don't understand women!" Crush exclaimed, rubbing the back of his neck and groaning in irritation. "What the heck made her run off all o' a sudden?"

Crash shrugged again, looking just as helpless as the stronger bandicoot. They were worried, at least a bit. They doubted her to be in any danger, because after the whole NV incident Cortex and the other villains had gone mostly under the radar and were still recovering from their losses. It was too soon for them to launch an attack. But when she ran off and disappeared, it usually meant she was sulking. Nobody liked her mood swings during such times, first and foremost, but during the few times they'd found her, she'd been…not just zoned out, but not even there. Her eyes weren't just unfocused; they were empty, like a beach as the tide goes out. Depending on what she was sulking about, they'd found her with shaking hands, tears running down her cheeks, expression nonexistent, like a shell of what had once been Coco. Coco was like that – there was no middle ground with her. As logical, as intelligent as she was, she was also a teenage girl, and she felt more strongly than most. There was no middle ground for her – she was either ecstatic or depressed, excited or horrified, brave or scared, loving or furious. It ran in the family, but particularly with her. So when she was upset over something, she was depressed, not just mildly saddened but entirely miserable. Neither of the brothers were keen to leave her alone in such a situation long.

"Let's split up," Crunch suggested, and Crash nodded. Crunch gave a salute, turning to run past Coco's house and past the corner where Crash could see him. Crash took off himself in the opposite direction.

As Crash ran, he remembered the first time she'd run off. It was shortly after they'd met, before Crunch had joined the family, back when she practically called him nothing but "Big Brother" as though the idea of family was too glorious of a thought for her not to use the words at every opportunity she was given. They'd fought about something trivial, and Crash had stomped off in petty anger. He, not one to hold grudges, had gotten over it quickly and had returned to apologize. Once he'd gotten back, she hadn't been there, and he'd been scared, terrified, and after much searching found her hiding in a small cave, crying her eyes out. When he'd touched her shoulder, her head had jerked up with shock and she'd quickly glanced away from him, embarrassed and muttering, "I thought you left." And, being as while he might have been childish, foolhardy and silly, he certainly wasn't stupid, he'd understood. And he'd hugged her tightly to tell her that, no, he'd never leave her. And she had slowly, hesitantly, afraid he'd disappear at her touch, hugged him back.

Then, things changed. She got older, more independent. She started calling him Crash more than Big Brother, spent less time on her laptop and more time with friends…growing up. But whenever she was scared, she still hugged him just the same way she had after that first argument, looking for reassurance, for purpose in her brother's embrace. And he did the same to her. The thought osing the things they had gained, each other, was inconceivable. Was agonizing.

He was snapped from his musings by the sound of a sniffle. A distinctly Coco-like sniffle. He glanced around, then up, and saw the bottom of her shoe, presumably attached to her leg, hanging from a tree. He walked under it quietly until he was on the opposite side of the trunk, then climbed up quickly. Sure enough, there she was, holding something in her hand, looking at it, empty eyed, with silent tears rolling down her furry face. Before he saw what she was holding, he stepped onto an old branch that creaked slightly under his weight and betrayed him. She stiffened, gasped and shoved the object in her pocket as her head whipped around to see him, and she calmed as soon as she did. Her eyes were just coming into focus, but it was clear she'd been crying for a while. "Oh-oh, it's just you," she muttered, wiping at her eyes quickly to remove the tears and smiling weakly, trying to seem tough. "Sorry, did I worry you guys?"

Crash smiled comfortingly in return, but then glanced at her pocket. She sighed, realizing he'd seen, and slowly took out the object that had captured her attention just moments before. She handed it to him silently, looking away from him and out over the ocean. He took it, studied it for a moment, then looked at her curiously. Why…?

"Crash…why are there only…three of us in that picture?" she asked quietly, not looking at him and gracing him only with a view of the back of her head. He glanced back at the photograph of the three of them, Coco, Crunch and himself, all holding each other and laughing. Smiling. _Happy._

He waited patiently for her to explain, sitting down next to her. She stared straight ahead and after a few minutes, whispered without looking at him, teeth clenched to keep from crying, "Shouldn't there be…two more?"

Crash took longer to understand this time because Coco wouldn't speak, too busy trying not to cry, and if she tried to do anything else, she would break and start sobbing all over again. And Coco, being Coco, didn't and still doesn't like the idea of crying in front of her brothers, which is why she runs off and hides.

"Like a mom…and a dad…?" she finally choked out, and Crash's eyes widened. And he remembered. He remembered a play fight they'd had only a day ago when he'd hit her a bit harder than necessary on the shoulder, and she'd teased, "I'm telling mom!" And then suddenly, in a smaller voice she'd added, "Who is she, anyway?" After that their wrestling had been half-hearted on her side at best, and she'd seem less focused. Then she'd ran off entirely, and Crash sighed as it all clicked. She'd reminded herself of their parents (or lack thereof) and it was depressing her. Both Crunch and himself had thought about the same things.

"I mean…I can't help but wonder, ya know?" The words were suddenly flowing freely, she didn't seem able to stop them. "Did Cortex pick us all up at once, a family for his experiments? Are they still trapped with him? Or, or, did they di-die already?" she was stumbling, stuttering, tripping over her words but she couldn't slow down. "Or was it just us? Are, are our parents still out there somewhere, looking for us? Or did th-they abandon us and make it easy for Cortex? I want a mom to boss me around, to lecture me about, about boys and make me do chores and ground me and tuck me into bed at night, and a dad to protect me and lift me up on his shoulders. When my friends whine about their parents I just wanna scream!" As she said the word, her voice raised an octave and she let out a shriek. "Are they stupid, our parents, I mean, who just don't care, or do they even miss us? Would they care if they found out where we are, what we are, what we've done? Would they care enough to wonder about us? Are they dead, killed by a fox like some idiot rat told, just to look cool because he doesn't freaking know anything, nothing, or are the still alive? Do you think they're looking for us?" She stopped then, taking a long, deep breath.

"I hate not knowing, Crash, anything about them! Nothing! I feel like an orphan, like I don't know who I am because I don't know who I came from! I know that's stupid but I can't help it! I can't stand not knowing whether mom and dad gave a damn –" Crash is mildly shocked. Coco never swears, but she doesn't stop talking love enough for him to worry about it. "—about us! Whether they're looking for us or praying for us or loving us or dead or—anything! If, if they've been looking for us this whole time and we'll never know. Never…"

And right then, she broke. Broke into loud sobs, clinging to Crash who clung right back, scared by her questions and scared because he didn't know the answers. Scared because he's her Big Brother but he still can't reassure her or tell her anything for certainty, scared because he's asked himself all the same questions a million times over. And so he just held her as she sobbed because she knew very well that she would never meet her parents and because a part of her wasn't sure she ever wanted to. And he cried, too, for the same reasons as her but also because he hated knowing that no matter what he does, he cannot be her father or her mother, he cannot be what she needs.

It took several minutes, but eventually she stopped crying before he did. She held him tightly anyway, letting his tears dry before she pulled away. He smiled sadly at her.

"S-Sorry." She glanced down at the picture in his hand, smiling softly at it. "It's not…it's not like you guys aren't enough. But I…"

He pressed a furry orange finger to her lips, grinning slightly. He nodded. He knew.

"Thank…thank you, Big Brother," she said, lapsing back into a childish name to call him, and he smiled. "Do you think…they miss us?"

Crash looked into the bright orange-pink sky and after a moment of thought, nodded. Their parents had to miss them. They just had to. Even if they never met their parents, the three siblings could at least comfort themselves with the belief that their parents, wherever they were, missed them. Coco watched him and nodded, too, believing her Big Brother as she always did and always will.

And then he hopped down from the tree, landing on the ground, and grinned stupidly back up at her. She followed suit and mirrored his smirk. "Guess we better go find Crunch, huh? Don't want him thinking we're both sulking." Her teasing grin widened, and he wrapped an arm around her shoulder, pulling her to him and laughing as they walked away.

And very quietly, with great difficulty but at the same time with great sincerity, Crash said, "I love you."


End file.
